Set Induction: Genesis 37
(ה) וַיַּחֲלֹם יוֹסֵף חֲלוֹם וַיַּגֵּד לְאֶחָיו וַיּוֹסִפוּ עוֹד שְׂנֹא אֹתוֹ.
(5) And Joseph dreamed a dream, and he told it to his brethren; and they hated him yet the more.
In Primal Leadership, Goleman, McKee and Boyatzis (2002) define four dimensions of emotional intelligence. Two are internal (self-awareness and self-management) and two are external (social awareness and relationship management). (Bolman and Deal, p. 169)
1. Why did Joseph tell his brothers his dreams?
2. Was Joseph operating with emotional intelligence?
Text #1: The Importance of Self-Awareness
(ג) תורת אמת כזאת מוכרחת שתתקיים בתורת הכרח של מצוה ואמונה בפרטיה, כל זמן שתהיה האנושות עדיין צריכה להדרכה, כל זמן שעוד לא מלאה הארץ דעה עד שכל יחיד מוצא בבירור גמור את כל תעודתו מהכרת עצמו, שאז היא מתעלה מכלל אמונה לכלל מדע מבורר.
(3) A Torah of truth like this must be fulfilled in a framework of compulsion of commandment and faith in its details, so long as humanity still needs instruction, so long as the world has not yet achieved full knowledge, where every individual will have a clear understanding of his full destiny from knowing himself. At that point, following the Torah will no longer be based on faith and commandment, but it will transcend faith to become clear knowledge.
Text #2: Balancing Emotional Capacity and Intellect
Rav Kook: “Man cannot live with intellect alone, nor with emotion alone; intellect and emotion must forever be joined together. If he wishes to burst beyond his own level, he will lose his ability to feel, and his flaws and deficiencies will be myriad despite the strength of his intellect. And needless to say, if he sinks into unmitigated emotion, he will fall to the depths of foolishness, which leads to all weakness and sin. Only the quality of equilibrium, which balances intellect with emotion, can deliver him completely” (Scholem, Devarim be-Go, 326-327)
Text #3: Shleimut As a Jewish Value
Rabbi Soloveitchik: Judaism has insisted upon the integrity and wholeness of the table of emotions, leading like a spectrum from joy, sympathy, and humility (the conjunctive feelings) to anger, sadness and anguish (the disjunctive emotions). Absolutization of one feeling at the expense of others, or the granting of unconditioned centrality to certain emotions while denoting others to a peripheral status, may have damaging complications for the religious development of the personality.” - (A Theory of Emotions)
For your consideration: how do we translate emotional intelligence into what Sura Hart and Victoria Kindle Hodson call "Relationship Intelligence"?
What is Relationship Intelligence? Relationship Intelligence is a natural capacity we all have to engage power with each other for mutual well-being. It comprises a set of capacities that we are born with but that are rarely developed to the level of competencies. The ability to relate intelligently is deeply encoded in the DNA of human potential because our survival depends on it.
Relationship Intelligence calls us to develop these four skills:
1. To take responsibility and care for my needs
2. To care about others' needs
3. To value all needs equally
4. To find strategies that can meet everyone's needs
Final Text:
(א) וְלֹא יָכֹל יוֹסֵף לְהִתְאַפֵּק לְכֹל הַנִּצָּבִים עָלָיו וַיִּקְרָא הוֹצִיאוּ כָל אִישׁ מֵעָלָי וְלֹא עָמַד אִישׁ אִתּוֹ בְּהִתְוַדַּע יוֹסֵף אֶל אֶחָיו. (ב) וַיִּתֵּן אֶת קֹלוֹ בִּבְכִי וַיִּשְׁמְעוּ מִצְרַיִם וַיִּשְׁמַע בֵּית פַּרְעֹה. (ג) וַיֹּאמֶר יוֹסֵף אֶל אֶחָיו אֲנִי יוֹסֵף הַעוֹד אָבִי חָי וְלֹא יָכְלוּ אֶחָיו לַעֲנוֹת אֹתוֹ כִּי נִבְהֲלוּ מִפָּנָיו. (ד) וַיֹּאמֶר יוֹסֵף אֶל אֶחָיו גְּשׁוּ נָא אֵלַי וַיִּגָּשׁוּ וַיֹּאמֶר אֲנִי יוֹסֵף אֲחִיכֶם אֲשֶׁר מְכַרְתֶּם אֹתִי מִצְרָיְמָה. (ה) וְעַתָּה אַל תֵּעָצְבוּ וְאַל יִחַר בְּעֵינֵיכֶם כִּי מְכַרְתֶּם אֹתִי הֵנָּה כִּי לְמִחְיָה שְׁלָחַנִי אֱלֹהִים לִפְנֵיכֶם.
(1) Then Joseph could not refrain himself before all them that stood by him; and he cried: ‘Cause every man to go out from me.’ And there stood no man with him, while Joseph made himself known unto his brethren. (2) And he wept aloud; and the Egyptians heard, and the house of Pharaoh heard. (3) And Joseph said unto his brethren: ‘I am Joseph; doth my father yet live?’ And his brethren could not answer him; for they were affrighted at his presence. (4) And Joseph said unto his brethren: ‘Come near to me, I pray you.’ And they came near. And he said: ‘I am Joseph your brother, whom ye sold into Egypt. (5) And now be not grieved, nor angry with yourselves, that ye sold me hither; for God did send me before you to preserve life.
Consider what you know about emotional intelligence and relationship intelligence, based both on our conversation and reading:
1. How does Joseph's interaction with his brothers differ from when he told them his dream?
2. How would you characterize Joseph's emotional intelligence in this interaction? What about his relationship intelligence?