How to Change Your Fate: Views on “Ut’shuva, ut’fillah, utzedakah”

“Unetaneh Tokef” “on one foot”:

“Unetaneh Tokef” is a prayer said on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. It points out that we don’t know what our fate will be in the coming year.

Unetaneh Tokef

Context: Un’taneh Tokef is a prayer said in the Musaf service on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. It dates back to the Middle Ages. In the 1100s, Ephraim ben Jacob of Bonn claimed that it was written by Amnon of Mainz.

How do you feel about the idea that repentance, prayer, and righteousness/charity mitigate the severity of the decree?

Where does this idea come from?

Context: This is from the Babylonian Talmud, Tractate Rosh Hashanah, which is about Rosh Hashanah (unsurprisingly). This sugya (section) is commenting on a mishnah which says that people are judged on Rosh Hashanah. Rabbi Yitzchak had several things to say about that, and this is one of them.

What four things can you do to get your judgement torn up?

Context: This is from the Mishnah Torah, by Maimonides. Maimonides tried to reorganize and summarize all the rules in the Babylonian Talmud. This is from his section on repentance.

According to Maimonides, what are some things you can do if you are truly repentant?

Context: This is from Genesis Rabba, a book of Midrash about the Biblical Book of Genesis. It is commenting on Gen. 15:5, when G-d tells Abraham to count the stars. I think the connection is that G-d is telling Abraham not to consider himself ruled by the stars - that he may think that he is foretold to not have a child, but there are ways around that.

If you do prayer, charity, and repentance, what can that accomplish?

So, how have things evolved?

The Babylonian Talmud said four things rip up a person’s decree: tzedakah, crying out, change of name, and change of deed. Bereishit Rabba said three things abrogate a person’s decree: tefillah, tzedakah, and teshuvah. Un’taneh Tokef says three things mitigate the harshness of a person’s decree: Teshuvah, tefillah, and tzedakah. This change brings it in line with Pirkei Avot 1:2: “The world stands on three things - Torah, Avodah (worship), and G’milut Chasadim (deeds of loving kindness).” - Dr. Reuven Kimelman

And here’s another version of Bereishit Rabba

What might these rabbis have been thinking about?

Context: This is from the Biblical Book of Jonah. After running away from G-d’s mission for him, he goes to Nineveh to deliver G-d’s message.

Is this an example of repentance, prayer, or charity averting an evil decree?

Context: This is from the Biblical Book of Exodus, after the Israelites make the Golden Calf but before Moses goes down the mountain.

Is this an example of repentance, prayer, or charity averting an evil decree?

Context: This is from the Babylonian Talmud, Tractate Shabbat. As a way of explaining something from the Mishnah, a rabbi cited a note in his notebook, and then other (non-Shabbat-related) things were mentioned because they were in rabbis’ notebooks. This story is related to a note that some rabbi had about whether the stars control our fates.

Is this an example of repentance, prayer, or charity averting an evil decree?

Contemporary Interpretations

A Musical Connection of Note

[Un’taneh Tokef] begins with a congregational melody (Scale degrees: 5-5 – 1 – 1 3 – 1) which comes from a 19th century choral setting by Louis Lewandowski, the composer of our Friday evening Kiddush. We will use this same melody again [for the “Ut’shuvah, ut’fillah, utzedakah” line] at the end of B’Rosh HaShana, three paragraphs later (Scale degrees: 5-5 – 1 – 1 3 – 1).

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We have here three realms of relationship. “T’shuva” is what we are doing here during Rosh HaShana and Yom Kippur – reflection and introspection so as to see where we went astray last year. We could call this “relationship with ourselves”, with our own hearts and souls.

“T’fillah” is prayer, our communication with God about the results of our reflection and introspection. Hopefully we will resolve to do better in the coming year with how we try to live an upright and honorable life. On Yom Kippur we spend the entire day, from Kol Nidre through Neilah, asking of God forgiveness for our mistakes.

The third realm is our relationship with everyone around us through “Tz’dakah”, which literally means “Righteousness”. In our Machzor it is translated as “Deeds of Kindness” that social justice imperative to take care of those who need care. If we reach out to others, and if we help to make the world a better place using the gifts that God gives to each of us, the transformation in our own lives becomes tangible and powerful.

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Shannah Tovah - may we all help inscribe ourselves in the Book of Life through our words and deeds in the coming years.

Excerpts from a Rosh Hashanah sermon by Cantor Neil Schwartz, 2009

How does this lend insight into your understanding of the prayer?

Not Who Shall Live, but How Shall We Live

We need a better way to relate to this prayer that is so central to our High Holiday liturgy. I have come to understand this disturbing and powerful text less as a promise of childlike reward and punishment and more as a statement of the fragility of life and our own mortality. I have literally been moved to tears (no small challenge while trying to sing with a full voice along with the choir) looking out at a full sanctuary, everyone’s voices joined in the familiar refrain:

B’rosh hashanah yikateivun uv’yom tzom kippur yeichateimun

On Rosh Hashanah it is written and on Yom Kippur it is sealed

At that moment, I realize that not all of us will be here next year. These people — congregants, friends, family — it is a sad but inescapable fact that some will die over the course of the coming year. Our lives are a gift. We perform teshuvah not to appease a distant and invisible Deity, but rather to remind us of our value to one another and strengthen our relationships with each other. We give tzedakah to better the lives of those around us. And we engage in prayer to further develop the bonds of our connection to Judaism and our community.

Our job is not to temporarily put on our best behavior in order to convince God to let us live for another year. Instead, we acknowledge that our time here on earth is limited and our lives tenuous. The true and vital message of Unetaneh Tokef requires us to ask ourselves not who shall live, but how shall we live?

Cantor Matt Axelrod - https://www.myjewishlearning.com/article/unetaneh-tokef-do-we-control-our-fate/

How does this lend insight into your understanding of the prayer?

​​​​​​​What it does and doesn’t mean

“The Talmud originally taught that when we pray, and do Teshuva and Tzedakah (charity), during the ten days between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, we actually succeed in having the Divine decree against us torn up - ma’akirin et ha-gezerah. The terrible things we did are as if they never happened, and their consequences won’t happen either.

But do prayer, Teshuvah, and Tzedakah actually change our fate? The rabbis who came along later realized that of course they do not. The real change is in the way we perceive the world. So they changed the language of the prayer accordingly. Now we say, Teshuvah, Tefillah, and Tzedakah ma’avirin et ro-at ha-gezerah. The act of Teshuvah is no longer seen as ripping up the evil decree. Now it transforms the evil of the decree. Teshuvah doesn’t change what happens, and it doesn’t change the way we are. It merely changes the way we see these things. We no longer see things as evil, we simply see them as they are, and that makes all the difference.”

Lew, Rabbi Alan. This is Real, and You Are Completely Unprepared. 2003

How does this lend insight to your understanding of the prayer?

Thoughts found in Who By Fire, Who By Water

Edited by Rabbi Lawrence Hoffman, 2010

Note About the Translation

1. The same root a.v.r. appears throughout Un'taneh Tokef. The entire goal of the High Holidays is the mitigation of G-d’s decree. Unclear if the second half means that the decree is changed to be less bad, or the decree is the same but the “badness” is less. - Rabbi Joel Hoffman

Part I: The Moral Challenge of Unetaneh Tokef

2. It is loathsome to say that if you just prayed a little harder on Rosh Hashanah, your impending cancer might not be as aggressive. - Rabbi Tony Bayfield

3. It is a paradox that Un'taneh Tokef claims that everybody has a judgement already written down, and yet your thoughts (Repentence), words (Prayer), and deeds (Charity) can save you. - Rabbi Andrew Goldstein

4. Teshuvah (self-reflection and change) might help us change the end result of a life situation, or it might help us weather an existing life situation, and sometimes it seems to neither mitigate our circumstances nor improve our outlook. - Rabbi Noa Kushner

5. This line doesn’t mean “You weren’t good enough to keep your mother from dying of cancer”. Rather, the fact that the rabbis changed the original version from “annul the decree” to “cause the evil of the decree to pass” means that it’s a response to the arbitrary misfortunes that occur all around us. - Rabbi Marc Saperstein

6. The poet who wrote these words sought something to keep his spirit afloat, to “help the hardship of the decree pass”. He didn’t declare this to be the cure, because otherwise this is like blaming the victim for the crime. - Rabbi Daniel Zemel

Part II: Reinterpreting Unetaneh Tokef for Our Time

7. Biblical Israelites would recognize none of this line, nor even the High Holidays as a concept. In the Bible, shuv means “returning to G-d” sometimes, but Teshuvah does not mean “repentence”. This is all a Rabbinic development. - Dr. Marc Brettler

8. The root a.v.r. has different connotations throughout Un’taneh Tokef, so we cannot interpret this line simplistically (do good and good will happen to you). The first time a.v.r. happens in this prayer, it’s objective judgement, but the second time it references random judgement (the 10th sheep to pass under a staff was the tithe). - Rabbi Elie Kaunfer

9. While our judgement is inscribed on Rosh Hashanah, it is not sealed until Yom Kippur because Teshuvah, tefillah, and tzedakah can help us change our outcome. Moreover, they provide the resilience to bear the ups and downs of life. Repentence works on our relationship with the self (mind), prayer works on our relationship with G-d (tongue), and charity works on our relationship with others (hand). Having a good relationship with all of these helps us overcome adversity. - Dr. Reuven Kimelman

10. Reducing our ego through these three things helps make space for G-d. - Rabbi Lawrence Kushner

11. When faced with an impending loss of life, repentance, prayer, and giving of money (usually to doctors) tend to happen. Then it’s up to G-d whether these three things “avert the decree” or “avert the harshness of the decree”. - Rabbi Ruth Langer

12. Teshuvah, tefillah, and tzedakah are to the harsh decree like rehab is to an addiction; they don’t eliminate the issue, but teach us how to live with it. They are also like rain falling over the years after a volcanic eruption - they turn the barren landscape into a foundation for life. - Rabbi Margaret Moers Wenig

13. G-d may determine how we die, but these three things help determine how we live. Other than death, nothing in life is inevitable. - Dr. Wendy Zierler

Part III: Un’taneh Tokef and the Limitations of the Human Condition

14. We cannot ensure long life, but we can find meaning, purpose, and celebration in the life we have. Though we cannot live forever, we can choose to make a life worth living. - Rabbi Sharon Brous

15. The decree stands. What G-d has given us are three tools for ameliorating, and, thereby, transcending the harsh facts of human life. We are free to share our character. We are able to share our common suffering and celebration in prayer and song. We are equipped to heal and to help one another and to bring a measure of peace to the world. - Rabbi Ed Feinstein

16. We reach within (Teshuvah), we reach beyond (Tefillah), and we reach toward others (Tzedakah). Through repentance, prayer, and charity we learn, and then we teach, the great lessons that come from adversity. - Rabbi Karyn Kedar

17. It’s not that we can pray, do teshuvah, and give tzedakah but only G-d is actually the doer, but rather that through our actions we can influence who will die by fire, water, etc. - Rabbi Asher Lopatin

18. Teshuvah, tefillah, and tzedakah will not save us, but they will save others from the end that awaits us all. - Catherine Madsen

19. “Transform the harshness in our destiny” - This translation offers the potential of a practical transformation of our lives through our conscious change in behavior - at the very least, a psychological strengthening of our ability to cope with the challenges that confront us. - Rabbi Jonathan Magonet

20. Genuine acts of apology and forgiveness, expressions of gratitude and lament, and both monetary giving and acts of justice can enrich the quality of our lives. - Rabbi Or Rose

21. Our ability to repent and effect change in our own lives, our capacity to reach out to G-d, our facility for reaching out to others - these temper the harshness of life’s circumstances by asserting our redemptive capacity for response. - Rabbi David Stern

22. We are all born with predispositions - to alcoholism, to weight gain, to anger - but we have it within our power to reshape, although not totally alter, our fate. - Rabbi Avi Weiss

23. The decree is death, and nothing can avert that. But, a clear conscience, a close relationship with G-d, and a loving community can ease the ache somewhat. The end comes, but softly. - Rabbi David Wolpe

Part IV: Unetaneh Tokef and Its Call for Sanctity, Transformation, and Renewal

24. Repentance, prayer, and charity may give us a little more time. But change is incredibly difficult, given the demands of the day. At the High Holidays we seek to figure out how we can change. - Rabbi Ruth Durschlag

25. Through repentance we change to being a person who is no longer judged; through prayer we change to being a person who has found our voice; and through charity we change to being a person who sustains life. All this is part of kedushat hachayim, the way we sanctify our own lives. - Rabbi Daniel Landes

26. We can be kinder, more forgiving, more generous. We may not be able to make our lives longer, but we can make them better, less bitter, more loving. We may find ourselves facing unintended circumstances, confronting situations not of our making. Those circumstances aren’t inherently meaningful, but can give them purpose. - Rabbi Sandy Eisenberg Sasso

27. On Rosh Hashanah, we pray that through our repentance, prayer, and donating, we have the shock absorbers for the bumps in life. On the day after Rosh Hashanah, we pray with our hands and feet that all who suffer will have the shock absorbers they need - provided by the Divine through our actions. - Ruth Messinger

28. I cannot control the unexpected blowed that will affect my family, my job, my health. But I can control how I live with them. Walking the path of Torah, cultivating gratitude, and pursuing justice can radically transform how I am affected by those blows. - Rabbi David Teutsch

29. Perfection is not the goal - perfecting is. You go about perfecting the self and perfecting the world through repentance, prayer, and charity. - Dr. Ron Wolfson

Which of these particularly resonate for you?

Appendix: “At the Edge of the Abyss”, by Rabbi Sharon Brous

Published in Who By Fire, Who By Water, 2010

“Life changes fast. Life changes in the instant. You sit down to dinner and life as you know it ends.” Joan Didion wrote these words after her husband died suddenly one night at dinner.

I read Joan Didion after my dear friend died a couple of years ago from a massive brain tumor that had been discovered about forty hours earlier. She was thirty-one years old, pregnant with her second child, just finishing her PhD, and struggling, like so many of us, to balance her professional aspirations with her instinctive need to be a good mother, wife, and friend.

Rabbi Eliezer taught, “Repent one day before your death.” His students, baffled, asked him, “But how can we possibly know when we’ll die?” Rabbi Eliezer replied, “All the more reason you should repent today, just in case you die tomorrow” (Talmud, Shabbat 153a).

The great spiritual challenge of the High Holy Days is to recognize the fragility of life, the brevity and capriciousness of human existence - but not in some distant, theoretical way. The challenge of the High Holy Days is to confront the radically unpredictable trajectory of our lives and live as if every day truly might be our last.

Many of us struggle to overcome the terror of death through avoidance and repression - we simply couldn’t function were we to live with its awareness. But our tradition compels us to recognize that afar anachnu, “All we are is dust” (Psalm 103:14) - the end is inescapable. The only legitimate choice is to face death’s inevitability with a dedication to living a certain kind of life.

The centrality of Un’taneh Tokef in the liturgy of Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur reflects the Rabbis’ understanding that an awareness of our deep vulnerability is the very essence of the religious and spiritual life. “Life changes fast. Life changes in an instant.” There’s simply no time for denial or escapism.

After the death of a child in our neighborhood, I called one of my rabbinic colleagues who was supporting the bereaved family. “What can I do to support you?” I asked. “Go home and hug your kids,” he said. And I did. For an instant, I felt the weight, the privilege, and the burden of having a love so rich in the world. I understood the preciousness and the capriciousness of life.

That is precisely what Un’taneh Tokef is designed to accomplish. Our tradition, in all its wisdom, demands that we obliterate the false protective shelter and, knowing that each moment might be our last, fight for a life of meaning today. The High Holy Days force us to shift from denial of death to purposeful engagement with life.

Un’taneh Tokef climaxes with the words Ut’shuvah, ut’fillah, utz’dakah ma’avirin et ro’a hag’zerah, “And repentance, prayer, and charity help the hardship of the decree pass”. We can’t dictate our fate. We can’t hide from death. But there are three things that we can do to bring meaning into the radical uncertainty of our lives.

T’shuvah (“repentance”): You don’t have to be a static, stagnant being, dwelling perpetually in the mistakes of years past. You can choose to make t’shuvah, affirming that life is dynamic and people change. Find the courage to ask for forgiveness from the people you have hurt. Find the strength to forgive those who have hurt you and the audacity to forgive yourself. Open your heart and embrace the people around you - most importantly those you most often take for granted. Hug your kids.

T’fillah (“prayer”): You don’t have to be alone. You are part of a story that is bigger than you, where the critical currency is G-d and the soul, not money, power, or celebrity. Let the majesty of nature distract you. Open your heart to pain. Let the world take your breath away. Connect to something beyond the physical, the tangible, the utterly graspable. Allow yourself not to understand and yet to appreciate anyway. Live in mystery.

Tz’dakah (“charity”): Stop digging yourself further and further into your own dramas, as if the privileges of freedom and prosperity come with no responsibility to others. Open your eyes and give a damn! Let your heart break over illness, poverty, loss, and violence. Affirm the power of love! Bring healing and comfort! Stake your claim in the world!

T’shuvah, t’fillah, and tz’dakah will not save us from cancer; they cannot protect us from terror. In fact, an alternative early version records the assertion as, Ut’shuvah, ut’fillah, utz’dakah m’vatlin et ro’a hag’zerah, “And repentance, prayer, and charity nullify the decree.” But this version didn’t survive - the Rabbis simply couldn’t stomach the false promise that doing good things would grant long life. They couldn’t bear the implication that those who die must have done something wrong. They wouldn’t delude us into believing in some magical formula that would ensure a long and healthy life.

And yet they insisted we are not powerless in the face of life’s capriciousness. We cannot ensure long life, but we can find meaning, purpose, and celebration in the life we have. So they settled on Ut’shuvah, ut’fillah, utz’dakah ma’avirin et ro’a hag’zerah, “And repentance, prayer, and charity help the hardship of the decree pass.” The decree cannot be changed. But we retain the power to make for ourselves a life worth living.

This is the great challenge of a Jewish religious consciousness: on one hand, we are to remember that our lives can be taken from us at any moment; on the other, we are to affirm our unique human capacity to effect change in our lives and in the world and to love with every ounce of our being. The annual High Holy Day encounter with death is designed to unsettle our routines, break us free from stagnation, and shock our system out of its instinctive selfishness and indulgence. It compels us to ask, “If my life ended now, would it have been worthwhile?”

I know for my friend who died of the brain tumor, the answer to that question was yes. To love with all your heath, to believe with unflinching faith, to sing without inhibition - this is a life worth living. Is ours?

The horror of death’s inevitability lets us at least begin to touch the beauty and the profundity of life. Though we cannot live forever, we can choose to make a life worth living.