Jacob, Esau, and reconciliation

(4) Jacob sent messengers ahead to his brother Esau in the land of Seir, the country of Edom, (5) and instructed them as follows, “Thus shall you say, ‘To my lord Esau, thus says your servant Jacob: I stayed with Laban and remained until now; (6) I have acquired cattle, asses, sheep, and male and female slaves; and I send this message to my lord in the hope of gaining your favor.’”

(7) The messengers returned to Jacob, saying, “We came to your brother Esau; he himself is coming to meet you, and there are four hundred men with him.” (8) Jacob was greatly frightened; in his anxiety, he divided the people with him, and the flocks and herds and camels, into two camps, (9) thinking, “If Esau comes to the one camp and attacks it, the other camp may yet escape.”

(10) Then Jacob said, “O God of my father Abraham and God of my father Isaac, O LORD, who said to me, ‘Return to your native land and I will deal bountifully with you’! (11) I am unworthy of all the kindness that You have so steadfastly shown Your servant: with my staff alone I crossed this Jordan, and now I have become two camps. (12) Deliver me, I pray, from the hand of my brother, from the hand of Esau; else, I fear, he may come and strike me down, mothers and children alike. (13) Yet You have said, ‘I will deal bountifully with you and make your offspring as the sands of the sea, which are too numerous to count.’”

(14) After spending the night there, he selected from what was at hand these presents for his brother Esau: (15) 200 she-goats and 20 he-goats; 200 ewes and 20 rams; (16) 30 milch camels with their colts; 40 cows and 10 bulls; 20 she-asses and 10 he-asses. (17) These he put in the charge of his servants, drove by drove, and he told his servants, “Go on ahead, and keep a distance between droves.” (18) He instructed the one in front as follows, “When my brother Esau meets you and asks you, ‘Whose man are you? Where are you going? And whose [animals] are these ahead of you?’ (19) you shall answer, ‘Your servant Jacob’s; they are a gift sent to my lord Esau; and [Jacob] himself is right behind us.’” (20) He gave similar instructions to the second one, and the third, and all the others who followed the droves, namely, “Thus and so shall you say to Esau when you reach him. (21) And you shall add, ‘And your servant Jacob himself is right behind us.’” For he reasoned, “If I propitiate him with presents in advance, and then face him, perhaps he will show me favor.” (22) And so the gift went on ahead, while he remained in camp that night.

(23) That same night he arose, and taking his two wives, his two maidservants, and his eleven children, he crossed the ford of the Jabbok. (24) After taking them across the stream, he sent across all his possessions. (25) Jacob was left alone. And a man wrestled with him until the break of dawn. (26) When he saw that he had not prevailed against him, he wrenched Jacob’s hip at its socket, so that the socket of his hip was strained as he wrestled with him. (27) Then he said, “Let me go, for dawn is breaking.” But he answered, “I will not let you go, unless you bless me.” (28) Said the other, “What is your name?” He replied, “Jacob.” (29) Said he, “Your name shall no longer be Jacob, but Israel, for you have striven with beings divine and human, and have prevailed.” (30) Jacob asked, “Pray tell me your name.” But he said, “You must not ask my name!” And he took leave of him there. (31) So Jacob named the place Peniel, meaning, “I have seen a divine being face to face, yet my life has been preserved.”

(1) Looking up, Jacob saw Esau coming, accompanied by four hundred men. He divided the children among Leah, Rachel, and the two maids, (2) putting the maids and their children first, Leah and her children next, and Rachel and Joseph last. (3) He himself went on ahead and bowed low to the ground seven times until he was near his brother. (4) Esau ran to greet him. He embraced him and, falling on his neck, he kissed him; and they wept. (5) Looking about, he saw the women and the children. “Who,” he asked, “are these with you?” He answered, “The children with whom God has favored your servant.” (6) Then the maids, with their children, came forward and bowed low; (7) next Leah, with her children, came forward and bowed low; and last, Joseph and Rachel came forward and bowed low;

(8) And he asked, “What do you mean by all this company which I have met?” He answered, “To gain my lord’s favor.” (9) Esau said, “I have enough, my brother; let what you have remain yours.” (10) But Jacob said, “No, I pray you; if you would do me this favor, accept from me this gift; for to see your face is like seeing the face of God, and you have received me favorably. (11) Please accept my present which has been brought to you, for God has favored me and I have plenty.” And when he urged him, he accepted.

(12) And [Esau] said, “Let us start on our journey, and I will proceed at your pace.” (13) But he said to him, “My lord knows that the children are frail and that the flocks and herds, which are nursing, are a care to me; if they are driven hard a single day, all the flocks will die. (14) Let my lord go on ahead of his servant, while I travel slowly, at the pace of the cattle before me and at the pace of the children, until I come to my lord in Seir.” (15) Then Esau said, “Let me assign to you some of the men who are with me.” But he said, “Oh no, my lord is too kind to me!” (16) So Esau started back that day on his way to Seir. (17) But Jacob journeyed on to Succoth, and built a house for himself and made stalls for his cattle; that is why the place was called Succoth.

למצא חן בעיניך THAT I MAY FIND FAVOUR IN THY EYES, for I am at peace with you and seek your friendship.

...Esau ran to greet him. [He embraced Jacob and, falling on his neck,] he kissed him; [and they wept.] (Gen. 33:4). [The word] 'kissed' is dotted [above each letter in the Torah's writing]. Rabbi Simeon ben Elazar said . . . it teaches that [Esau] felt compassion in that moment and kissed [Jacob] with all his heart. Rabbi Yannai said to him: If so, why is ['kissed'] dotted? On the contrary, it teaches that [Esau] came not to kiss [Jacob] but to bite him, but our ancestor Jacob's neck became like marble and that wicked man's teeth were blunted. Hence, 'and they wept' teaches that [Jacob] wept because of his neck and [Esau] wept because of his teeth.

באנו אל אחיך אל עשו WE CAME TO THY BROTHER, TO ESAU — to him of whom you said he is my brother, but he behaves towards you as Esau, the wicked — he is still harbouring hatred (Genesis Rabbah 75:7).

ויירא...ויצר HE FEARED GREATLY AND WAS DISTRESSED — He was afraid lest he be killed, and he was distressed that he might have to kill someone (Genesis Rabbah 76:2).

קטנתי מכל החסדים I AM TOO UNWORTHY OF ALL THE MERCIES (This may be rendered “I am small — unworthy — because of all the kindnesses) — My merits are diminished in consequence of all the kindness and truth which You have already shown me. For this reason I am afraid: perhaps, since You made these promises to me, I have become depraved (נתקלקלתי) by sin (another version of Rashi has נתלכלכתי, I have become defiled by sin) and this may cause me to be delivered unto Esau’s power (Shabbat 32a).

ואת אחד עשר ילדיו AND HIS ELEVEN CHILDREN — But where was Dinah? He placed her in a chest and locked her in so that Esau should not set his fancy upon her (desire to marry her). On this account Jacob was punished — because he had kept her away from his brother for she might have led him back to the right path; she therefore fell into the power of Shechem (Genesis Rabbah 76:9).

וישקהו AND HE KISSED HIM — Dots are placed above the letters of this word, and a difference of opinion is expressed in the Baraitha of Sifré (בהעלותך) as to what these dots are intended to suggest: some explain the dotting as meaning that he did not kiss him with his whole heart, whereas R Simeon the son of Johai said: Is it not well-known that Esau hated Jacob? But at that moment his pity was really aroused and he kissed him with his whole heart. (Sifrei Bamidbar 69.2)

ויחבקהו AND EMBRACED HIM — His pity was aroused when he saw him prostrating himself so many times (Genesis Rabbah 78:8).

And he did not even suffer me to kiss my daughters and their children, but he carried away my ‎daughters like captives taken by the sword, and he stole also my gods and ran away. And now I ‎have left him in the mountains near the river Jabbok with all that is his; he lacketh nothing. And ‎now if it be thy desire to go unto him thou canst find him there, and thou canst do unto him ‎whatsoever pleaseth thee best. And Laban's messengers went and told unto Esau all these ‎words. And when Esau heard the words of Laban's messengers, his anger was kindled against ‎his brother, and he remembered his hatred and his wrath burned within him. And Esau ‎hastened and gathered together his sons and his servants and the people of his household, ‎sixty men, and he assembled likewise all the sons of Seir the Horite, and their people, three ‎hundred and forty men, and he went with this number of four hundred men, to smite his ‎brother Jacob. And Esau divided this number into several bands. And he took the sixty men of ‎his sons and servants and the people of his household in one band, and intrusted them to ‎Eliphaz his oldest son. And the remaining bands he intrusted to the care of the six sons of Seir ‎the Horite, placing every man over his family and their children. And the entire camp moved ‎ahead with Esau among them, who urged them on to great speed. And Laban's messengers, ‎after having left Esau, went into the land of Canaan to the house of Rebekah, the mother of ‎Jacob and Esau and they said unto her: Be hold Esau thy son went with four hundred men ‎against his brother Jacob; for he hath heard of his coming, and therefore he went to wage war ‎with him and to kill him and to take away all that he hath. And Rebekah sent hastily seventy-‎two men of Isaac's servants to go and meet Jacob, for she said Esau might perhaps surprise ‎him on the road when meeting him. And those messengers went and they met Jacob on the ‎road on the opposite side of the brook Jabbok, and Jacob saw them and he exclaimed: This ‎camp is sent to me from God, and he called the name of that place Mahanaim. And Jacob ‎recognized all his father's men, and he kissed and embraced them and came together with all ‎of them, and inquired concerning his father and mother, and they said: All is peace with them. ‎And the messengers said unto Jacob: Thy mother Rebekah sent us to thee, saying: I have ‎heard that thy brother Esau hath gone to meet thee on the road with men from the midst of ‎the sons of Seir the Horite. Now therefore my son, listen unto my voice and reflect what thou ‎art to do. And when he meeteth thee entreat him, and do not speak unto him harshly, and ‎give him gifts from whatsoever thou findest in thy hands, wherewith the Lord hath favored ‎thee graciously. And when he inquires of thee concerning thy matters and affairs do not ‎withhold it from him, maybe he will thus be turned from his anger and thou wilt save thyself ‎and all those that are with thee, for it is in thy place to give him respectful answers as he is the ‎oldest brother.‎‏ ‏And when Jacob heard the words of his mother as told unto him by the ‎messengers, Jacob lifted up his voice and he wept a great weeping and he did at once ‎according to the command of his mother.‎

And Jacob sent messengers at the same time to Esau his brother in the land of Seir, and he ‎spoke unto him words of prayer and supplication.‎‏ ‏And he commanded them saying: Thus shall ‎ye speak unto my lord, unto Esau: Thy servant Jacob saith thus: Let not my lord think that the ‎blessings wherewith my father hath blessed me was of any benefit to me. For I have ‎sojourned with Laban these twenty years and he hath deceived me, changing my wages ten ‎times as it hath already been stated unto my lord. And I have served him in his house a very ‎hard servitude until God saw my trouble, my servitude and the work of my hands, and he ‎granted me to find grace and mercy in his eyes, and afterwards I became possessed through ‎God’s kindness and his great mercy, of oxen and of asses, and of men servants and of maid ‎servants. And I am returning now to my land and my native place, to my father and mother ‎who are in the land of Canaan, and I am desirous to impart all these things to my lord in order ‎to find favor in the eyes of my lord, so that he may not think that I have acquired wealth by ‎reason of the blessings by which my father hath blessed me. And the messengers went unto ‎Esau and they met him on the boundary of the land of Edom, marching against Jacob with four ‎hundred men of the sons of Seir the Horite with their drawn swords. And Jacob's messengers ‎spoke unto Esau all that Jacob had told them concerning Esau. And Esau answered them in ‎pride and contempt, saying unto them: Verily I have heard of it and I have been correctly ‎informed of what Jacob hath done unto Laban. For Laban made him great and gave him his ‎daughters to wives; and he begat sons and daughters, and he increased greatly in possession ‎and wealth in Laban’s house. But as soon as he saw the abundance of his possessions and ‎wealth he fled from Laban's house with all that belonged unto him, carrying away Laban's ‎daughters from the presence of their father like captives taken by the sword, without telling ‎Laban a word about it. But Laban is not the only one whom Jacob hath treated in such a way, ‎for he hath done unto me after the same manner, and he hath supplanted me twice. And shall ‎I now be silent? And now behold I have come with my camp to meet him, and I will deal with ‎him according to the best of my mind. And the messengers returned unto Jacob saying: We ‎came to thy brother Esau and we spoke unto him according to all thou hast said, and such was ‎his answer unto us, and also he cometh to meet thee and four hundred men with him. And ‎when he heard the words which Esau had spoken to his messengers, Jacob was greatly afraid ‎and distressed. And Jacob prayed unto the Lord his God saying: Oh Lord, God of my fathers ‎Abraham and Isaac, thou hast said unto me at my departure from my father's house, saying: I ‎am the Lord, the God of Abraham thy father, and the God of Isaac, the land whereon thou ‎liest, to thee will I give it, and to thy seed. And behold I am with thee and will keep thee in all ‎places whither thou goest, and I will multiply thy seed as the stars of heaven, and I will cause ‎thy enemies to fall down before thee, and when they shall wage war against thee they shall ‎never prevail over thee. And I will bring thee back into this land in joy and gladness, with ‎children and with great wealth. And thou hast fulfilled thy words and thou hast given unto me ‎wealth and children and cattle, whatsoever the heart of thy servant wished for thou hast given ‎unto me, and whatsoever I asked for thou hast granted unto me, so that I was not wanting in ‎the least. And thou hast finally said unto me: Return unto thy country and thy kindred and I will ‎deal well with thee. And now behold I have fol lowed thy words and thou hast delivered me ‎from the hands of Laban, and shall I fall now into the hands of Esau who will smite me and the ‎mothers with the children? Oh deliver me, I pray thee, from the hand of my brother, from the ‎hand of Esau, and if there be no merit in me do it for the sake of Abraham and Isaac my father, ‎for I know that simply through grace and mercy have I obtained all this wealth. And behold, I ‎beseech thee now for the same reason to deliver me to day in thy kindness, and to answer ‎unto me.‎