ראש חודש אדר - על השמחה
הדף מאת: דפנה קרטס-הרדוף ורותי פויכטונגר סגל / המדרשה באורנים
בראש חודש אדר אנחנו מצווים להרבות בשמחה. לכאורה קיימת סתירה בין שמחה מתפרצת, שהיא חסרת גבולות, יצרית וספונטנית, לבין הציווי הקבוע בזמן לשמוח, על פי כללים ידועים. במתח זה יעסוק הלימוד באמצעות פסוקים מספר דברים, ר' נחמן מברסלב, הרמב"ם, הרב קוק ושיר של גלית אורן.
פתיחה: מהי שמחה? האם היא ניגודו של הצער?
ר' נחמן מברסלב, ספר ליקוטי הלכות, הלכות פריה ורביה ואישות, הלכה ג
כְּלָל שֶׁצָּרִיךְ הָאָדָם לִהְיוֹת בְּשִׂמְחָה תָּמִיד וּלְהִתְגַּבֵּר בְּשִׂמְחָה כָּל כָּךְ עַד שֶׁיַּחֲטֹף אֶת הַיָּגוֹן וְהָאֲנָחָה, שֶׁהֵם כָּל הַמָּרָה שְׁחוֹרָה וְהָעַצְבוּת, יַחֲטֹף אוֹתָם וְיַכְנִיסֵם לְתוֹךְ הַשִּמְחָה בְּעַל כָּרְחָם, עַד שֶׁיַּהֲפֹךְ הַיָּגוֹן וַאֲנָחָה לְשִׂמְחָה...
דיון
לפי השקפתו של ר' נחמן, יצירת השמחה היא משימה קשה. מהי אותה משימה וכיצד יש לממש אותה?
חַג הַסֻּכֹּת תַּעֲשֶׂה לְךָ שִׁבְעַת יָמִים בְּאָסְפְּךָ מִגָּרְנְךָ וּמִיִּקְבֶךָ: וְשָׂמַחְתָּ בְּחַגֶּךָ אַתָּה וּבִנְךָ וּבִתֶּךָ וְעַבְדְּךָ וַאֲמָתֶךָ וְהַלֵּוִי וְהַגֵּר וְהַיָּתוֹם וְהָאַלְמָנָה אֲשֶׁר בִּשְׁעָרֶיךָ.
And thou shalt rejoice in thy feast, thou, and thy son, and thy daughter, and thy man-servant, and thy maid-servant, and the Levite, and the stranger, and the fatherless, and the widow, that are within thy gates.
וְלָקַחְתָּ מֵרֵאשִׁית כָּל פְּרִי הָאֲדָמָה אֲשֶׁר תָּבִיא מֵאַרְצְךָ אֲשֶׁר ה' אֱלֹהֶיךָ נֹתֵן לָךְ וְשַׂמְתָּ בַטֶּנֶא וְהָלַכְתָּ אֶל הַמָּקוֹם אֲשֶׁר יִבְחַר ה' אֱלֹהֶיךָ לְשַׁכֵּן שְׁמוֹ שָׁם: ... וְשָׂמַחְתָּ בְכָל הַטּוֹב אֲשֶׁר נָתַן לְךָ ה' אֱלֹהֶיךָ וּלְבֵיתֶךָ אַתָּה וְהַלֵּוִי וְהַגֵּר אֲשֶׁר בְּקִרְבֶּךָ.
And thou shalt rejoice in all the good which the LORD thy God hath given unto thee, and unto thy house, thou, and the Levite, and the stranger that is in the midst of thee.
וּבָאוּ עָלֶיךָ כָּל הַקְּלָלוֹת הָאֵלֶּה וּרְדָפוּךָ וְהִשִּׂיגוּךָ עַד הִשָּׁמְדָךְ כִּי לֹא שָׁמַעְתָּ בְּקוֹל ה' אֱלֹהֶיךָ לִשְׁמֹר מִצְוֹתָיו וְחֻקֹּתָיו אֲשֶׁר צִוָּךְ: וְהָיוּ בְךָ לְאוֹת וּלְמוֹפֵת וּבְזַרְעֲךָ עַד עוֹלָם: תַּחַת אֲשֶׁר לֹא עָבַדְתָּ אֶת ה' אֱלֹהֶיךָ בְּשִׂמְחָה וּבְטוּב לֵבָב מֵרֹב כֹּל.
because thou didst not serve the LORD thy God with joyfulness, and with gladness of heart, by reason of the abundance of all things;
דיון
  • על איזו שמחה מצווה התורה?
  • האם ניתן לצוות על שמחה?
  • איך השמחה באה לידי ביטוי דתי?
  • איך היא באה לידי ביטוי רגשי?
האם מקור השמחה הוא פנימי או חיצוני?
הלכה יז: שבעת ימי הפסח ושמונת ימי החג עם שאר ימים טובים כולם אסורים בהספד ותענית, וחייב אדם להיות בהן שמח וטוב לב הוא ובניו ואשתו ובני ביתו וכל הנלוים עליו שנאמר (דברים ט"ז) ושמחת בחגך וגו', אף על פי שהשמחה האמורה כאן היא קרבן שלמים כמו שאנו מבארין בהלכות חגיגה יש בכלל אותה שמחה לשמוח הוא ובניו ובני ביתו כל אחד ואחד כראוי לו.
הלכה יח: כיצד? הקטנים נותן להם קליות ואגוזים ומגדנות, והנשים קונה להן בגדים ותכשיטין נאים כפי ממונו, והאנשים אוכלין בשר ושותין יין שאין שמחה אלא בבשר ואין שמחה אלא ביין, וכשהוא אוכל ושותה חייב להאכיל (דברים ט"ז) 'לגר ליתום ולאלמנה' עם שאר העניים האומללים, אבל מי שנועל דלתות חצרו ואוכל ושותה הוא ובניו ואשתו ואינו מאכיל ומשקה לעניים ולמרי נפש, אין זו שמחת מצוה אלא שמחת כריסו, ועל אלו נאמר (הושע ט) 'זבחיהם כלחם אונים להם כל אוכליו יטמאו כי לחמם לנפשם', ושמחה כזו קלון היא להם שנאמר (מלאכי ב) 'וזריתי פרש על פניכם פרש חגיכם'.
The seven days of Passover and the eight days of Sukkot along with the other holidays are all forbidden for eulogizing and fasting. And one is obligated to be joyful and of a good heart on them—he, his children, his wife, the members of his household and all who accompany him. As it is stated (Deuteronomy 16:14), "And you shall rejoice in your holiday, etc." Even though the joy that is mentioned here is [referring to] peace offerings—as we explain in the Laws of the Festival Offering—included in that joy is for him, his children and the members of his household to rejoice—everyone according to what is fit for him. The children, for example, should be given parched grain, nuts, and sweetmeats; the womenfolk should be presented with pretty clothes and trinkets according to one's means; the menfolk should eat meat and drink wine, for there is no real rejoicing without the use of meat and wine. While eating and drinking, one must feed the stranger, the orphan, the widow, and other poor unfortunates. Anyone, however, who locks the doors of his courtyard and eats and drinks along with his wife and children, without giving anything to eat and drink to the poor and the desperate, does not observe a religious celebration but indulges in the celebration of his stomach. And about such is it stated (Hosea 9:4), "their sacrifices are like the bread of mourners, all who eat it will be contaminated; for their bread is for their own appetites." Such joy is a disgrace for them, as it is stated (Malakhi 2:3), "I will spread dung on your faces, the dung of your festivals."
הרב קוק, שמונה קבצים, ג, נא
שנואה היא העצבות, מפני שהיא נובעת ממקור היותר משחת שבדעות וברגשות. הידיעה שהאדם, בהתגלותו בתור יצור בעל רצון, אופיו משתלם כולו בנקודת רצונו דוקא, האושר שלו הוא רצון טוב, כל קוי האושר וההצלחות הרוממות, שלֵב כל אדם כל כך עורג להם, אינם כי אם תולדות מנקודת חיים מלאים זו, נקודת הרצון הטוב, הקדוש והבהיר, ובתוכן זה דומה האדם בחופשו ליוצרו, ליוצר כל, בחפצו המקיף והחפשי מכל מועקה – כשידיעה זו מתבררת, מיד מוצא האדם את עצמו מלא חדוה, מסולק מכל עצבות. ... המחשבה שהאושר תלוי במה שהוא מחוץ ליכולתו של האדם, ממה שהוא חוץ להוויתו וחוץ לרצונו, מחשבת פיגול היא, רשעות וסכלות היא מרופדת, והיא מעוררת את כל התכונות השפלות, וכל המידות הרעות שביסוד הרשעה, שכחת ה' וטוב, אורו וישעו, חכמתו, חסדו וגבורתו. על כן ישרי לב שמחים תמיד, שמחו בה' וגילו צדיקים, והרנינו כל ישרי לב.
דיון
  • מה מקורה של השמחה במקורות אלו?
  • האם יש הבדל מהותי בין שמחה הבאה ממקור פנימי, לבין שמחה הנובעת ממקור חיצוני?
  • מה עוד אתם לומדים על השמחה?
  • עם איזה מקור אתם מזדהים יותר?
האם לשמחה יש גבולות?
הלכה כ
כשאדם אוכל ושותה ושמח ברגל, לא ימשך ביין ובשחוק ובקלות ראש ויאמר שכל מי שיוסיף בזה ירבה במצות שמחה, שהשכרות והשחוק הרבה וקלות הראש אינה שמחה אלא הוללות וסכלות, ולא נצטוינו על ההוללות והסכלות אלא על השמחה, שיש בה עבודת יוצר הכל, שנאמר (דברים כ"ח) 'תחת אשר לא עבדת את ה' אלהיך בשמחה ובטוב לבב (מרב כל)' הא למדת שהעבודה בשמחה, ואי אפשר לעבוד את השם לא מתוך שחוק ולא מתוך קלות ראש ולא מתוך שכרות.
הלכה כא
חייבין בית דין להעמיד שוטרים ברְגלים שיהיו מסבבין ומחפשין בגנות ובפרדסים ועל הנהרות כדי שלא יתקבצו לאכול ולשתות שם אנשים ונשים ויבואו לידי עבירה, וכן יזהירו בדבר זה לכל העם כדי שלא יתערבו אנשים ונשים בבתיהם לשמחה, ולא ימשכו ביין שמא יבואו לידי עבירה.
When one eats and drinks on a festival, he should not be drawn after wine or joking or light-headedness, and say that the more one can increase this, the more enhances the commandment of joy. For drunkenness, much joking and ligh-headedness are not joy, but rather wildness and foolishness. And we were not commanded about wildness and foolishness, but rather about joy that has service to the Maker of everything. As it is stated (Deuteronomy 28:47), "because you did not serve the Lord your God with joy and with a good heart, from abundance of all." Thus you have learned that the service is to be with joy. But it is impossible to serve God, neither from joking, nor from lightheadness nor from drunkenness. The court is obligated to set up guards on the festivals to go around and inspect gardens, orchards and riverbanks, so that men and women not gather there [together] to eat and drink and [possibly] come to sin. And likewise should they warn all of the people about this thing—so that men and women not mix in their houses for joy—nor be drawn after wine—lest they come to sin.
אמר רבא: חייב אדם להתבסם בפורים עד שלא ידע [להבחין] בין ארור המן לברוך מרדכי. רבה ורבי זירא עשו סעודת פורים ביחד. השתכרו. קם רבה ושחט את רבי זירא. למחרת ביקש (רבה) עליו רחמים וחי (רבי זירא). לשנה האחרת אמר לו (רבה): יבוא אדוני ונעשה סעודת פורים ביחד! אמר לו (רבי זירא): לא בכל שעה ושעה מתרחש נס.
You have fulfilled two mitzvot through us, our teacher: The mitzva of: “And sending portions one to another,” and the mitzva of: “And gifts to the poor,” as Rabbi Oshaya was poor and this was a substantial gift. The Gemara relates that Rabba sent Purim portions from the house of the Exilarch to Marei bar Mar in the hands of Abaye, who was his nephew and student. The Purim portions consisted of a sack [taska] full of dates [kashva] and a cupful of roasted flour [kimḥa de’avshuna]. Abaye said to him: Now, Mari will say the popular expression: Even if a farmer becomes the king, the basket does not descend from his neck. Rabba was named the head of the yeshiva in Pumbedita, and nevertheless, he continued to send very plain gifts, because he was impoverished. Marei bar Mar sent back to him a sack full of ginger and a cupful of long peppers [pilpalta arikha], a much more expensive gift. Abaye said to him: The master, Rabba, will now say: I sent him sweet items and he sent me pungent ones. In describing that same incident, Abaye said: When I left the house of the master, Rabba, to go to Marei bar Mar, I was already satiated. However, when I arrived there at Marei bar Mar’s house, they served me sixty plates of sixty kinds of cooked dishes, and I ate sixty portions from each of them. The last dish was called pot roast, and I was still so hungry that I wanted to chew the plate afterward. And in continuation Abaye said: This explains the folk saying that people say: The poor man is hungry and does not know it, as Abaye was unaware how hungry he had been in his master’s house. Alternatively, there is another appropriate, popular expression: Room in the stomach for sweets can always be found. The Gemara relates that Abaye bar Avin and Rabbi Ḥanina bar Avin would exchange their meals with each other to fulfill their obligation of sending portions on Purim. Rava said: A person is obligated to become intoxicated with wine on Purim until he is so intoxicated that he does not know how to distinguish between cursed is Haman and blessed is Mordecai. The Gemara relates that Rabba and Rabbi Zeira prepared a Purim feast with each other, and they became intoxicated to the point that Rabba arose and slaughtered Rabbi Zeira. The next day, when he became sober and realized what he had done, Rabba asked God for mercy, and revived him. The next year, Rabba said to Rabbi Zeira: Let the Master come and let us prepare the Purim feast with each other. He said to him: Miracles do not happen each and every hour, and I do not want to undergo that experience again. Rava said: A Purim feast that one ate at night did not fulfill his obligation. What is the reason? “Days of feasting and gladness” (Esther 9:22) is written, i.e., days and not nights. The Gemara relates: Rav Ashi was sitting before Rav Kahana his teacher on Purim, and it grew dark and the Sages who usually came to study with him did not come. Rav Ashi said to him: What is the reason that the Sages did not come today? Rav Kahana answered: Perhaps they are preoccupied with the Purim feast. Rav Ashi said to him: Wasn’t it possible for them to eat the feast at night on Purim, instead of being derelict in their Torah study on Purim day? Rav Kahana said to him: Didn’t the master learn that which Rava said: A Purim feast that one ate at night did not fulfill his obligation? Rav Ashi said to him: Did Rava say that? Rav Kahana said to him: Yes. Rav Ashi then learned it from him forty times until he remembered it so well that it seemed to him as if it were placed in his purse. mishna The previous mishna concluded with the formula: The difference between…is only, thereby distinguishing between the halakhot in two different cases. The following mishnayot employ the same formula and distinguish between the halakhot in cases unrelated to Purim and the Megilla. The first is: The difference between Festivals and Shabbat with regard to the labor prohibited on those days is only in preparing food alone. It is permitted to cook and bake in order to prepare food on Festivals; however, on Shabbat it is prohibited. gemara The Gemara infers that with regard to the matter of actions that facilitate preparation of food, e.g., sharpening a knife for slaughter, this, Shabbat, and that, Festivals, are equal, in that actions that facilitate preparation of food are prohibited. The Gemara comments: If so, the mishna is not in accordance with the opinion of Rabbi Yehuda, as it is taught in a baraita: The difference between Festivals and Shabbat is only is preparing food. Rabbi Yehuda permits even actions that facilitate preparation of food on Festivals. The Gemara elaborates. What is the reason for the opinion of the first tanna? It is as the verse states: “Except that which every person must eat, only that may be done for you” (Exodus 12:16). “That” is permitted, and not actions that facilitate it. And Rabbi Yehuda says: “For you” means for you, for all your needs. The Gemara asks: And for the other, first, tanna too, isn’t it written: “For you”? The Gemara answers: He infers: For you, and not for gentiles; for you, and not for dogs. It is forbidden to perform labors for the sake of gentiles, or for animals, even if it is to feed them. The Gemara asks further: And for the other tanna, Rabbi Yehuda, too, isn’t it written: “That,” which is a restrictive term that limits the application of a particular halakha? The Gemara answers: It is written: “That,” which is restrictive, and it is written: “For you,” which is inclusive. Rabbi Yehuda resolves the conflict between the two: Here, the word: “That,” is referring to actions that facilitate, in which it is possible to perform them on the Festival eve but which are prohibited on the Festival; there, the phrase: “For you,” is referring to actions that facilitate, in which it is impossible to perform them on the Festival eve and which are permitted even on the Festival. MISHNA: The difference between Shabbat and Yom Kippur with regard to the labor prohibited on those days is only that in this case, i.e., Shabbat, its intentional desecration is punishable at the hand of Man, as he is stoned by a court based on the testimony of witnesses who forewarned the transgressor; and in that case, i.e., Yom Kippur, its intentional desecration is punishable at the hand of God, with karet. GEMARA: The Gemara infers that with regard to the matter of payment of damages, both this, Shabbat, and that, Yom Kippur, are equal in that one is exempt in both cases. If one performs an action on Shabbat that entails both a prohibited labor and damage to another’s property, since his transgression is punishable by death, he is exempt from paying damages. Apparently, according to the mishna, the same halakha applies to Yom Kippur. The Gemara asks: According to whose opinion is the mishna taught? The Gemara answers: It is according to the opinion of Rabbi Neḥunya ben HaKana, as it is taught in a baraita: Rabbi Neḥunya ben HaKana would render Yom Kippur like Shabbat with regard to payment of damages. Just as in the case of one who intentionally desecrates Shabbat he is liable to receive the death penalty and is therefore exempt from the obligation of payment of damages caused while desecrating Shabbat, so too, in the case of one who intentionally desecrates Yom Kippur, he is liable to receive the death penalty and is therefore exempt from the obligation of payment of damages caused while desecrating Yom Kippur. We learned there in a mishna (Makkot 23a): All those liable to receive karet who were flogged in court were exempted from their karet, which is imposed by heaven. Most transgressors are liable to receive karet for violating prohibitions that are punishable by flogging. If they are flogged, they are exempt from karet, as it is stated with regard to one liable to receive lashes: “Then your brother shall be dishonored before you” (Deuteronomy 25:3), indicating that once he was flogged he is like your brother, and his sins have been pardoned; this is the statement of Rabbi Ḥananya ben Gamliel. Rabbi Yoḥanan said: Rabbi Ḥananya ben Gamliel’s colleagues disagree with him on this issue. Rava said that the Sages of the school of Rav said: We learned: The difference between Yom Kippur and Shabbat is only that in this case, Shabbat, its intentional desecration is punishable at the hand of Man; and in that case, Yom Kippur, its intentional desecration is punishable with karet. And if the statement of Rabbi Ḥananya ben Gamliel is so, in both this case, Shabbat, and that case, Yom Kippur, the punishment is at the hand of Man. Rav Naḥman said: There is no proof from here that Rabbi Ḥananya ben Gamliel’s colleagues disagree with him, as in accordance with whose opinion is this mishna taught? It is according to the opinion of Rabbi Yitzḥak, who said: There are no lashes in cases of those liable to receive karet, as it is taught in a baraita that Rabbi Yitzḥak says: All those liable to receive karet in cases of incest were included in the principle: “For whoever shall commit any of these abominations, even the persons that commit them shall be cut off from among their people” (Leviticus 18:29). And why was karet administered to one’s sister excluded from this verse and mentioned independently (Leviticus 20:17)? It is to sentence her to the punishment of karet and not to the punishment of lashes. This serves as a paradigm; wherever one is liable to receive karet, there are no lashes. Rav Ashi said: Even if you say that the mishna is according to the opinion of the Rabbis who disagree with Rabbi Yitzḥak and hold that there are lashes even in cases where there is liability for karet, there is no proof that Rabbi Ḥananya ben Gamliel’s colleagues disagree with him. The mishna can be understood as follows: In this case, Shabbat, the primary punishment for its intentional desecration is at the hand of Man; and in that case, Yom Kippur, the primary punishment for its intentional desecration is with karet. If, however, he was flogged, he is exempt from karet.
דיון
  • האם צריך לשים גבולות לשמחה?
  • מהם הגבולות [ומה חסרונם]?
  • מה המסר של הסיפור בעניין זה?
אסיף: שמחה של נשים
תנו רבנן: חייב אדם לשמח בניו ובני ביתו ברגל, שנאמר: 'ושמחת בחגך'. במה משמחם? - ביין. ר' יהודה אומר: אנשים בראוי להם ונשים בראוי להן. אנשים בראוי להם - ביין. ונשים במאי? תני רב יוסף: בבבל בבגדי צבעונין, בארץ ישראל בבגדי פשתן מגוהצים.
The Sages taught: A man is obligated to gladden his children and the members of his household on a Festival, as it is stated: “And you shall rejoice on your Festival, you, and your son, and your daughter, and your manservant, and your maidservant, and the Levite, and the stranger, and the fatherless, and the widow that are within your gates” (Deuteronomy 16:14). With what should one make them rejoice? With wine. Rabbi Yehuda says: One should enable each member of his household to rejoice with an item that pleases them, men with what is fit for them and women with what is fit for them. Rabbi Yehuda elaborates: Men with what is fit for them, i.e., with wine. And as for the women, with what should one cause them to rejoice? Rav Yosef teaches: One should delight them with new clothes, in Babylonia with colored clothes and in Eretz Yisrael with the pressed linen clothes that are manufactured there.
רמב"ם, ספר המצוות, מצוות עשה נ"ד
שציוונו לשמוח ברגלים, והוא אָמרו יתברך: 'ושמחת בחגך'... והעניין הראשון הרמוז אליו בציווי הזה הוא שיקריב קרבן שלמים... ומהקרבת שלמים אלו יאמרו: נשים חייבות בשמחה... וכולל באומרו: 'ושמחת בחגך' מה שאמרו גם כן לשמוח בכל מיני שמחה, ומזה לאכול בשר ולשתות יין וללבוש בגדים חדשים ולחלק פירות ומיני מתיקה לקטנים ולנשים ולשחוק בכלי ניגון ולרקד במקדש... זה כולו נכנס תחת אמרו: 'ושמחת בחגך'.
ונשים חייבות במצווה זו - לא בקרבן אלא בשמחה. שתשמח עם בעלה, שתעלה עמו והוא ישמח אותה.
דיון
איזה סטריאוטיפ על נשים עולה מהמקורות? האם יש לו בסיס? מה משמח אותנו הנשים באמת? כיצד אנחנו מקרינות שמחה? האם להיות "שמחה בחלקך" היא השמחה האמיתית?
דף הנחיות למנחה:
אדר תיקונים הדס.rtf