Derech Eretz: The Way of the World

(7) Impress them upon your children. Recite them when you sit at home and when you walk upon the way, when you lie down and when you get up.

(6) In all your ways know God, And He will make your paths smooth ...(17) Her (wisdom's) ways are pleasant ways, And all her paths, peaceful. (18) She is a tree of life to those who grasp her, And whoever holds on to her is happy.

(9) The LORD will establish you as His holy people, as He swore to you, if you keep the commandments of the LORD your God and walk in His ways.

And Rabbi Ḥama, son of Rabbi Ḥanina, says: What is the meaning of that which is written: “After the Lord your God shall you walk (Deuteronomy 13:5)?

The meaning is that one should walk in the ways of the attributes of the Holy One, Blessed be He.

He provides several examples:

Just as God clothes the naked, as it is written: “And the Lord God made for Adam and for his wife garments of skin, and clothed them” (Genesis 3:21), so too, should you clothe the naked.

Just as the Holy One, Blessed be He, visits the sick, as it is written with regard to God’s appearing to Abraham following his circumcision: “And the Lord appeared unto him by the terebinths of Mamre” (Genesis 18:1), so too, should you visit the sick.

Just as the Holy One, Blessed be He, consoles mourners, as it is written: “And it came to pass after the death of Abraham, that God blessed Isaac his son” (Genesis 25:11), so too, should you console mourners. Just as the Holy One, Blessed be He, buried the dead, as it is written: “And he was buried in the valley in the land of Moab” (Deuteronomy 34:6), so too, should you bury the dead.

(2) Rabban Gamaliel the son of Rabbi Judah Hanasi said:

Excellent is the study of the Torah when combined with derech eretz, for toil in them both keeps sin out of one’s mind. But [study of the] Torah which is not combined with work (worldly occupation), in the end is worthless, and becomes the cause of sin.

Anyone who is [involved in] Scripture, the Oral Law, and proper social behavior derech eretz will not easily [come to] sin, as it is stated, "The three-ply cord is not quickly severed" (Ecclesiastes 4:12).
Anyone who is neither [involved in] Scripture, nor in the Oral Law, nor in proper social behavior / derech eretz is not part of civilization [lit. not from the settlement.]

"He is not from the settlement." He does not assist in the civilizing of the world. And his sitting is one of clowns (Psalms 1); and he is disqualified from giving testimony.

(17) Rabbi Elazar ben Azariah says: If there is no Torah, there is no worldly occupation [derech eretz], and if there is no derech eretz / worldly occupation, there is no Torah.

If there is no wisdom, there is no fear of God; if there is no fear of God, there is no wisdom. If there is no knowledge, there is no understanding; if there is no understanding, there is no knowledge.

If there is no flour, there is no Torah; if there is no Torah, there is no flour.

He used to say: Anyone whose wisdom exceeds his deeds, to what is he compared? To a tree who branches are many but whose roots are few; then the winds comes and uproots it and turns it upside down... But one whose deeds exceed one's wisdom, what is that person like? Like a tree whose branches are few, but whose roots are many; even if all the winds of the world were to come and blow upon it, they would not move it from its place...

3) Rabbi Yannai was once walking along the road, and saw a man who was extremely well dressed. Rabbi Yannai said to him: Would you like to come over to my house? The man replied: Yes. Rabbi Yannai brought him into his home, and gave him food and drink. As they were eating and drinking together, he examined him in his knowledge of Bible, and found out that he had none; examined his knowledge of Mishnah, and realized that he had none; his knowledge of legends, and saw that he had none; his knowledge of Talmud and saw he had none. Rabbi Yannai then told him: Wash and recite grace. Said the guest: Let Yannai recite grace in his own home. Seeing that he could not even recite a blessing, Yannai told him: Can you at least repeat what I say? Said he: Yes. Said Rabbi Yannai: repeat the following: 'A dog has eaten Yannai's bread.'

Offended, the man stood up, and grabbed Rabbi Yannai by the coat! He then said: ׳My inheritance is with you, and you are withholding it from me!׳

Said Rabbi Yannai with puzzlement: ׳What legacy of yours is there with me?׳

He replied: Once I passed by a school, and I heard the voices of the little children saying: 'Moses gave us the Torah, the inheritance of the congregation of Jacob.' (Deut 33:4) They did not say 'the inheritance of the congregation of Yannai,' but the 'congregation of Jacob.'

Rabbi Yannai asked, “How then are you worthy to eat at my table?”

The guest replied, “Never have I heard an evil word spoken against me and returned to argue with the person who spoke it. Never have I seen two people arguing without making peace between them.”

Rabbi Yannai then said, “(Oy!) That I called someone with so much Derech Eretz a dog!”

The Gemara notes that the Sages taught in a baraita: Four things require bolstering, constant effort to improve, and they are:

Torah, good deeds, prayer, and occupation [derech eretz]...

From where is it derived that derech eretz / occupation requires bolstering? As it is stated: “Be strong and we will be strong for the sake of our nation and for the cities of our God.” (II Samuel 10:12).

"Derech eretz": The way of the earth - If he is a craftsman, his craft; if he is a merchant, his commerce; if he is a warrior, his battle.

The Sages taught: What is the meaning of that which the verse states:
“And you shall gather your grain and your wine and your oil”? (Deut 11:14)

Since it is stated: “This Torah shall not depart from your mouths, and you shall contemplate in it day and night” (Joshua 1:8), I might have thought that these matters are to be understood as they are written: one is to literally spend his days immersed exclusively in Torah study.
Therefore, the verse states: “And you shall gather your grain, your wine and your oil.” That is to say, assume in their regard, the way of the world [derech eretz]: that is, set aside time not only for Torah, but also for work. This is the statement of Rabbi Yishmael.

(31) And the older one [of Lot's daughters] said to the younger, Our father is old, and there is not a man on earth to consort with us in the way of all the world, k'derech kol-ha'aretz.

Regarding the Israelites in Egypt, as it is written: “And He saw our affliction” (Deuteronomy 26:7). We say that "affliction" here refers to abstinence from conjugal relations [derech eretz].

Similarly, Rabbi Yoḥanan said: Even if the Torah had not been given, we would nonetheless have learned modesty from the cat, which covers its excrement, and that stealing is objectionable from the ant, which does not take grain from another ant, and forbidden relations from the dove, which is faithful to its partner, and proper relations [derech eretz] from the rooster, which first appeases the hen and then mates with it.

Ben Zoma... would say:

How much effort did Adam the first man exert before he found bread to eat? He plowed, sowed, reaped, sheaved, threshed, winnowed in the wind, separated the grain from the chaff, ground the grain into flour, sifted, kneaded, and baked and only thereafter he ate. And I, on the other hand, wake up and find all of these prepared for me. Human society employs a division of labor, and each individual benefits from the service of the entire world.

Similarly, how much effort did Adam the first man exert before he found a garment to wear? He sheared, laundered, combed, spun and wove, and only thereafter he found a garment to wear. And I, on the other hand, wake up and find all of these prepared for me. Members of all nations, merchants and craftsmen, diligently come to the entrance of my home, and I wake up and find all of these before me.

Ben Zoma would say:

A good guest, what does he say?

"How much effort did the host expend on my behalf, how much meat did the host bring before me! How much wine did he bring before me! How many loaves [geluskaot] did he bring before me!! All the effort that he expended, he expended only for me! "

However, a bad guest, what does he say?

"What effort did the host expend? I ate only one piece of bread, I ate only one piece of meat and I drank only one cup of wine. All the effort that the home owner expended he really only expended on behalf of his own family."

(3) Let this be your guide and motto: "The rain which comes continuously makes people tired of it, whilst they welcome it with gratitude as soon as it is kept back."

(27) Do not be oblivious to the good that others do for you. Acknowledge even those who do something as simple as opening a door for you⁷Train your children to acknowledge other peoples’ kindnesses by always saying “thank you” or by making some other obvious gesture such as nodding or waving in appreciation to a driver who stopped for them at a crosswalk. The very first thing we do when we awake each morning is say the very words “Modeh Ani” thanking God for returning our souls to our quiescent bodies. Hakaras Hatov is fundamental to Torah Im Derech Eretz. - RB, which you surely could have done on your own.

(15) Shammai used to say:

"Make your [study of the] Torah a fixed practice. Speak little, but do much. And receive everybody with a pleasant countenance."

(15) Rabbi Mathia ben Harash said:

"Upon meeting people, be the first to extend greetings.

And be a tail unto lions, and not a head unto foxes."

They said about Rabban Yoḥanan ben Zakkai that no one ever preceded him in issuing a greeting, not even a non-Jew in the marketplace, as Rabban Yoḥanan would always be the first to say hello.

R. Eliezer the Kapar said:

Distance yourself from anger, for by being angry at others you will add to your transgression.

Love your admonisher, for by doing so you will increase in wisdom. to your ability.

Shun the one who honors you, that your wisdom be not lessened.

Love the prayer-house, in order that you increase your divine wages every day.

Love the house of learning, so that your children also come to love study.

Love the poor, in order that your children shall not come to poverty... Your house shall be wide open, in order that you shall never lack food.' Be careful that the doors of your house not be closed when you take your meals, so that you don't open the door to poverty.

Be careful to honor your wife, so she does not end up barren.

Accept suffering with gladness, for this probably saves you from something worse (ie burns off karma).

Be joyful at your table when the hungry derive benefit from it, for this will lengthen your days, both in this world and in the world to come. Be also joyful when you have the opportunity to give charity from your house, for this may curb even the angel of death, as it is written [Prov. xxi. 14]: "A gift in secret pacifies anger, and a bribe in the bosom [neutralizes] strong fury."

(72) There is further benefit to joy. Consider the story of two men of whom it was said that they would have a share in the world to come because they were happy men and whenever they saw a sad man they would cheer him up, and whenever they saw two men quarreling with each other they would tell them humorous stories until they brought peace between the quarreling men.

And this is true in discussions of the law, the Sages would begin with humorous words to open the mind to study with joy. Of course, this does not mean vulgar humor or nonsensical jesting, but rather words concerning the precepts of the Torah which cause the heart to rejoice as it is written: "The precepts of the Lord are right, rejoicing the heart" (Ps. 19:9). And all this pertains to the joy of fulfilling the commandments.