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(טז) וּלְלָבָ֖ן שְׁתֵּ֣י בָנ֑וֹת שֵׁ֤ם הַגְּדֹלָה֙ לֵאָ֔ה וְשֵׁ֥ם הַקְּטַנָּ֖ה רָחֵֽל׃ (יז) וְעֵינֵ֥י לֵאָ֖ה רַכּ֑וֹת וְרָחֵל֙ הָֽיְתָ֔ה יְפַת־תֹּ֖אַר וִיפַ֥ת מַרְאֶֽה׃ (יח) וַיֶּאֱהַ֥ב יַעֲקֹ֖ב אֶת־רָחֵ֑ל וַיֹּ֗אמֶר אֶֽעֱבׇדְךָ֙ שֶׁ֣בַע שָׁנִ֔ים בְּרָחֵ֥ל בִּתְּךָ֖ הַקְּטַנָּֽה׃ (יט) וַיֹּ֣אמֶר לָבָ֗ן ט֚וֹב תִּתִּ֣י אֹתָ֣הּ לָ֔ךְ מִתִּתִּ֥י אֹתָ֖הּ לְאִ֣ישׁ אַחֵ֑ר שְׁבָ֖ה עִמָּדִֽי׃ (כ) וַיַּעֲבֹ֧ד יַעֲקֹ֛ב בְּרָחֵ֖ל שֶׁ֣בַע שָׁנִ֑ים וַיִּהְי֤וּ בְעֵינָיו֙ כְּיָמִ֣ים אֲחָדִ֔ים בְּאַהֲבָת֖וֹ אֹתָֽהּ׃ (כא) וַיֹּ֨אמֶר יַעֲקֹ֤ב אֶל־לָבָן֙ הָבָ֣ה אֶת־אִשְׁתִּ֔י כִּ֥י מָלְא֖וּ יָמָ֑י וְאָב֖וֹאָה אֵלֶֽיהָ׃ (כב) וַיֶּאֱסֹ֥ף לָבָ֛ן אֶת־כׇּל־אַנְשֵׁ֥י הַמָּק֖וֹם וַיַּ֥עַשׂ מִשְׁתֶּֽה׃ (כג) וַיְהִ֣י בָעֶ֔רֶב וַיִּקַּח֙ אֶת־לֵאָ֣ה בִתּ֔וֹ וַיָּבֵ֥א אֹתָ֖הּ אֵלָ֑יו וַיָּבֹ֖א אֵלֶֽיהָ׃ (כד) וַיִּתֵּ֤ן לָבָן֙ לָ֔הּ אֶת־זִלְפָּ֖ה שִׁפְחָת֑וֹ לְלֵאָ֥ה בִתּ֖וֹ שִׁפְחָֽה׃ (כה) וַיְהִ֣י בַבֹּ֔קֶר וְהִנֵּה־הִ֖וא לֵאָ֑ה וַיֹּ֣אמֶר אֶל־לָבָ֗ן מַה־זֹּאת֙ עָשִׂ֣יתָ לִּ֔י הֲלֹ֤א בְרָחֵל֙ עָבַ֣דְתִּי עִמָּ֔ךְ וְלָ֖מָּה רִמִּיתָֽנִי׃ (כו) וַיֹּ֣אמֶר לָבָ֔ן לֹא־יֵעָשֶׂ֥ה כֵ֖ן בִּמְקוֹמֵ֑נוּ לָתֵ֥ת הַצְּעִירָ֖ה לִפְנֵ֥י הַבְּכִירָֽה׃ (כז) מַלֵּ֖א שְׁבֻ֣עַ זֹ֑את וְנִתְּנָ֨ה לְךָ֜ גַּם־אֶת־זֹ֗את בַּעֲבֹדָה֙ אֲשֶׁ֣ר תַּעֲבֹ֣ד עִמָּדִ֔י ע֖וֹד שֶֽׁבַע־שָׁנִ֥ים אֲחֵרֽוֹת׃ (כח) וַיַּ֤עַשׂ יַעֲקֹב֙ כֵּ֔ן וַיְמַלֵּ֖א שְׁבֻ֣עַ זֹ֑את וַיִּתֶּן־ל֛וֹ אֶת־רָחֵ֥ל בִּתּ֖וֹ ל֥וֹ לְאִשָּֽׁה׃ (כט) וַיִּתֵּ֤ן לָבָן֙ לְרָחֵ֣ל בִּתּ֔וֹ אֶת־בִּלְהָ֖ה שִׁפְחָת֑וֹ לָ֖הּ לְשִׁפְחָֽה׃ (ל) וַיָּבֹא֙ גַּ֣ם אֶל־רָחֵ֔ל וַיֶּאֱהַ֥ב גַּֽם־אֶת־רָחֵ֖ל מִלֵּאָ֑ה וַיַּעֲבֹ֣ד עִמּ֔וֹ ע֖וֹד שֶֽׁבַע־שָׁנִ֥ים אֲחֵרֽוֹת׃
(16) Now Laban had two daughters; the name of the older one was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel. (17) Leah had weak eyes; Rachel was shapely and beautiful. (18) Jacob loved Rachel; so he answered, “I will serve you seven years for your younger daughter Rachel.” (19) Laban said, “Better that I give her to you than that I should give her to an outsider. Stay with me.” (20) So Jacob served seven years for Rachel and they seemed to him but a few days because of his love for her. (21) Then Jacob said to Laban, “Give me my wife, for my time is fulfilled, that I may cohabit with her.” (22) And Laban gathered all the people of the place and made a feast. (23) When evening came, he took his daughter Leah and brought her to him; and he cohabited with her.— (24) Laban had given his maidservant Zilpah to his daughter Leah as her maid.— (25) When morning came, there was Leah! So he said to Laban, “What is this you have done to me? I was in your service for Rachel! Why did you deceive me?” (26) Laban said, “It is not the practice in our place to marry off the younger before the older. (27) Wait until the bridal week of this one is over and we will give you that one too, provided you serve me another seven years.” (28) Jacob did so; he waited out the bridal week of the one, and then he gave him his daughter Rachel as wife.— (29) Laban had given his maidservant Bilhah to his daughter Rachel as her maid.— (30) And Jacob cohabited with Rachel also; indeed, he loved Rachel more than Leah. And he served him another seven years.
Rebecca’s Veil of Independence
HAYYEI SARAH BY : Rabbi LAUREN EICHLER BERKUNPOSTED ON NOV 22, 2004 / 27 MARHESHVAN 5764 | A TASTE OF TORAH
In a traditional Jewish wedding, there is a beautiful and dramatic ceremony before the chuppah known as the “bedeken” (Yiddish for “veiling”). At this celebratory moment, a groom is escorted with song and dance to meet his bride as he lowers the veil over her face. One popular explanation for the custom of bedeken is that the groom is “checking” (from the Hebrew root b-d-k) to make sure that he is marrying the correct woman. Jacob was tricked by Laban into marrying Leah, instead of Rachel, because she was masked behind a veil. However, the origin of the bedeken, “veiling,” ceremony is found in this week’s Torah portion.
In parashat Hayyei Sarah, Rebecca leaves her childhood home to join her future husband, Isaac. Upon seeing Isaac in the distance, Rebecca “took her veil and covered herself” (Genesis 24:65). Jewish brides replicate Rebecca’s gesture at every marriage by covering their faces with a veil. At the bedeken, it is also customary to bless the bride with the same blessing bestowed upon Rebecca, “O sister! May you grow into thousands of myriads” (Genesis 24:60).
Given this biblical precedent for the bedeken ceremony, the question still remains — what is the purpose of veiling a bride? Veiling is usually understood as a sign of modesty. A bride veils herself to signify that she will reserve herself solely for her husband. They alone will share a sacred intimacy. However, I would like to propose another symbolic theme of veiling suggested by our parashah.
Notice that Rebecca does not veil herself after meeting and wedding Isaac, as a sign that she is saving herself for the sole purview of her husband. Rather, she veils herself before approaching Isaac. Similarly today, a bride veils herself before the chuppah. The veil suggests that, despite the intimate union of marriage, a bride will retain her independence and her unique identity. Rebecca veils herself as if to say, “I will give myself to you, but there will always be a part of myself that is separate and distinct from you.” In the modern bedeken ceremony, when the groom himself lowers the veil over his bride, he affirms and respects his wife’s privacy and her individual self worth.
Marriage is a delicate balance. On the one hand, a loving marriage embraces the union, intimacy and selfless sharing of two lives. On the other hand, a successful marriage supports and fosters the personal growth and unique journeys of each partner throughout their lives. At a Jewish wedding, the chuppah represents the holy union of a bride and groom as they create a shared home together. The gossamer veil suggests that in the midst of their deep connection, each spouse will retain a healthy independence.
(סג) וַיֵּצֵ֥א יִצְחָ֛ק לָשׂ֥וּחַ בַּשָּׂדֶ֖ה לִפְנ֣וֹת עָ֑רֶב וַיִּשָּׂ֤א עֵינָיו֙ וַיַּ֔רְא וְהִנֵּ֥ה גְמַלִּ֖ים בָּאִֽים׃ (סד) וַתִּשָּׂ֤א רִבְקָה֙ אֶת־עֵינֶ֔יהָ וַתֵּ֖רֶא אֶת־יִצְחָ֑ק וַתִּפֹּ֖ל מֵעַ֥ל הַגָּמָֽל׃ (סה) וַתֹּ֣אמֶר אֶל־הָעֶ֗בֶד מִֽי־הָאִ֤ישׁ הַלָּזֶה֙ הַהֹלֵ֤ךְ בַּשָּׂדֶה֙ לִקְרָאתֵ֔נוּ וַיֹּ֥אמֶר הָעֶ֖בֶד ה֣וּא אֲדֹנִ֑י וַתִּקַּ֥ח הַצָּעִ֖יף וַתִּתְכָּֽס׃
(63) And Isaac went out walking in the field toward evening and, looking up, he saw camels approaching. (64) Raising her eyes, Rebekah saw Isaac. She alighted from the camel (65) and said to the servant, “Who is that man walking in the field toward us?” And the servant said, “That is my master.” So she took her veil and covered herself.
וְאִם יֵשׁ עֵדִים שֶׁיָּצְתָה בְּהִינוּמָא וְכוּ׳. מַאי הִינּוּמָא? סוּרְחַב בַּר פָּפָּא מִשְּׁמֵיהּ דִּזְעֵירִי אָמַר: תַּנּוּרָא דְאַסָּא. רַבִּי יוֹחָנָן אָמַר: קָרִיתָא דִּמְנַמְנְמָא בָּהּ כַּלְּתָא.
The mishna continues: And if there are witnesses that she went out of her father’s house to her wedding with a hinnuma her marriage contract is two hundred dinars. The Gemara asks: What is a hinnuma? Surḥav bar Pappa said in the name of Ze’eiri: It is a canopy of myrtle over the bride’s head. Rabbi Yoḥanan said: It is a veil [kerita] covering the bride’s face under which the bride dozes [menamna].
קריתא - צעיף על ראשה משורבב על עיניה כמו שעושין במקומינו ופעמים שמנמנמת בתוכו מתוך שאין עיניה מגולין ולכך נקרא הינומא על שם תנומה:
Karita - a scarf on her head is draped over her eyes like we do in our place and sometimes she dozes inside it without her eyes being covered and that is why she is called Hinoma after her nap (Gellman)
There are two definitions of the hinuma. The first is that it refers to the way the huppah itself was made. The second is that it refers to the veil. Since she sometimes falls asleep behind the veil. It is called “the veil under which the bride naps.”
Rebecca’s Veil of Independence
BY : LAUREN EICHLER BERKUN
Given this biblical precedent for the bedeken ceremony, the question still remains — what is the purpose of veiling a bride? Veiling is usually understood as a sign of modesty. A bride veils herself to signify that she will reserve herself solely for her husband. They alone will share a sacred intimacy. However, I would like to propose another symbolic theme of veiling suggested by our parashah.
Notice that Rebecca does not veil herself after meeting and wedding Isaac, as a sign that she is saving herself for the sole purview of her husband. Rather, she veils herself before approaching Isaac. Similarly today, a bride veils herself before the chuppah. The veil suggests that, despite the intimate union of marriage, a bride will retain her independence and her unique identity. Rebecca veils herself as if to say, “I will give myself to you, but there will always be a part of myself that is separate and distinct from you.” In the modern bedeken ceremony, when the groom himself lowers the veil over his bride, he affirms and respects his wife’s privacy and her individual self worth.
Marriage is a delicate balance. On the one hand, a loving marriage embraces the union, intimacy and selfless sharing of two lives. On the other hand, a successful marriage supports and fosters the personal growth and unique journeys of each partner throughout their lives. At a Jewish wedding, the chuppah represents the holy union of a bride and groom as they create a shared home together. The veil suggests that in the midst of their deep connection, each spouse will retain a healthy independence.