Illustration Credit: Elad Lifshitz, Dov Abramson Studio
Halakhah הֲלָכָה
When you walk in the door to your home or into your classroom, how does it feel when someone greets you with a smile? What if no one looks up from what they’re doing—what’s that like?
Here’s a teaching from the Gemara that emphasizes just how important it is to greet people in a friendly way. Notice how the lesson is connected to a pasuk from our parashah!
אָמַר רַבִּי יוֹחָנָן טוֹב הַמַּלְבִּין שִׁינַּיִם לַחֲבֵירוֹ יוֹתֵר מִמַּשְׁקֵהוּ חָלָב, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר "וּלְבֶן שִׁנַּיִם מֵחָלָב" (בראשית מט:יב) - אַל תִּקְרֵי לְבֶן שִׁינַּיִם אֶלָּא לִבּוּן שִׁינַּיִם.
R. Yohanan said: When you show the whites of your teeth to a person (by smiling at them) it’s even better than giving them milk to drink.
This is based on the words (in the blessing to Yehudah in our parashah): “u-le-ven shinayim mei-halav” (Bereishit 49:12). Instead of reading it le-ven shinayim mei-halav (which means, “his teeth are white from drinking milk”), change the vowels a little and read it: libbun shinayim mei-halav (which means, “white teeth—smiling—is better than milk”).
A similar idea is expressed by Shammai in Pirkei Avot (1:15), who says we should always greet people with a friendly face: בְּסֵבֶר פָּנִים יָפוֹת (b’sever panim yafot).
Avot De-Rabbi Natan (13:4) adds that if you give someone all the gifts in the world, but without a smile, it’s as if you haven’t given anything. On the other hand, simply greeting someone kindly–b’sever panim yafot– can be as good as giving them tons of gifts!
You can show sever panim yafot in lots of ways:
Try it! Spend a day really focusing on how you greet every person you see–whether it’s in the hall at school, or at the grocery store, or anywhere you go (don’t forget at home, too). What’s your experience? How do people seem to respond?
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