How to wear a kippa

So, you’re thinking of wearing a kippa. What are the rules? Who can wear one? When and how should one wear one?

Let’s look at the texts! Starting with a potential origin story:

In this first story, Rav Nachman’s mother hears a prophecy that her son will be a thief, and in order to suppress this evil inclination, Nachman dons a head covering/cloak so as to maintain his “fear of Heaven.” When it falls off of his head, he immediately steals some fruit from his neighbor’s tree “with his teeth.” What a wild story!

Also interesting to note that the phrase "fear/awe of Heaven" is related to the word "yarmulke," which comes from the Aramaic phrase "yira Malka" (fear/awe of the King)!

FYI this is a different Rav Nachman (this one is bar Yaakov)! I guess it was a common name…

Skipping the first sentence, this Rabbi Yitzchak is arguing that one who does wrong, even privately or secretly, is still known to be a wrongdoer by G-d and causes G-d to be distanced from the person. Then Rabbi Yehoshua ben Levi adds that one should never walk more than 4 cubits (6 feet) upright, so as to demonstrate humility before G-d. Let it be known Rabbi Yehoshua ben Levi is pro-slouching! Then the Gemara adds that Rav Huna ben Yehoshua (no relation) would not walk 4 cubits (presumably from his bed) without covering his head.

Is Rav Huna’s reasoning/motivation for wearing a head covering different from Rav Nachman bar Yitzchak? If different, in what ways?

Now let’s look at the halacha we derived from the reading above:

So this halacha seems pretty straight-forward and directly derived from the text. But, because straight-forward and simple things are not our way, let’s look at a more stringent commentary on this halacha! Note: this next commentary breaks up each phrase in the line “one should not walk 4 cubits with one’s head uncovered” and comments on each phrase separately, often with many specific examples and citations:

Okay, so let’s walk through what we just read:

- This halacha applies not just to walking out in public, but also inside and in your own house.

- There are disagreements on whether one is obligated to cover one’s head while sleeping/sitting or moving less than 4 cubits. The most stringent ruling is to always cover one’s head, even when sleeping. The most lenient says that one is not obligated to cover one’s head, even if they go farther than 4 cubits, unless they are “modest in their ways.”

- The Magen Avraham says we should teach pre-b’nai mitzvah children to wear a kippa so that it will become a habit for them, even though they are not yet obligated (but will be after b’nai mitzvah)

- There are some who rule that one may merely cover their heads with a hand, and others who say that that is only sufficient if moving less than 4 cubits

- One must wear a head covering when making a blessing or studying Torah. In a pinch, if out in public (and eating/drinking) without a hat, one should cover their head with their hand, with their sleeve pulled over their hand if possible.

- One should not lay tefillin without a head covering. Technically, a toupe counts as a head covering, but the more stringent opinion is that one should still wear a hat so as not to appear as though you are transgressing halacha (this concept is called “maarit ayin,” if you want to look it up).

This is a lot of specific rules from that one short line in Talmud! Can you believe how pedantic halacha can be? Isn’t it so fun that we like to build so much off of just one line?

Now, an important clarification: while this is the dominant ruling, it’s not the only interpretation. The Vilna Gaon, a major figure in the 1800s non-Chasidic Ashkenazi world, and the 1800s Sephardic posek (halachic authority) Chaim Yosef David Azulai, both ruled that one is not obligated to cover their head while praying and that this practice is more of an extra, optional virtue.

This piece of halacha is saying that some are of the opinion that one should not say G-d’s name (in Hebrew) without covering their head—this appears to be a stringency based on the earlier rule that one must cover their head when saying a blessing/praying. An even more stringent opinion is that one should not only cover their own head, but ensure that all heads are covered in a synagogue, at all times. It also agrees that one’s head should be covered with a material, even if it has gaps (like a woven straw hat), and one’s hand is not sufficient coverage.

I find it interesting that these halachists are attempting to maintain the Toraitic distinction between covering one’s head in prayer and in everyday life, while still supporting the opinions of those who cover their heads at all times. There is not a time in history when all Jews, or all Jewish men, covered their heads outside of prayer. In fact, even among Yeshiva University (Modern Orthodox) folks in the 1950s, some men did not cover their heads. Isn’t it beautiful that Judaism has always had a diversity of opinions and practices?

So, if it’s not obligated, why did wearing a kippa specifically become a dominant practice for Jews?

This excerpt from DailyHalacha.com establishes a few basic guidelines for us:

- Why wear a kippa, if it is not halachically necessary? Because it serves as a form of identity flagging, so that other people will know you are an "observant Jew," by whatever definition resonates with you. An important halachic precept to consider with this is the concept of ma'arit ayin, that one should not do things that might confuse or deceive others, even if it's technically kosher. Do you think it would be ma'arit ayin for a non-observant or non-religious Jew to wear a kippa everyday? Are there different types of kippot that would resolve this? Is ma'arit ayin referring to confusion/deception of other Jews, or does it matter what non-Jews think as well?

Another reason is that, in line with the Ta"z (David HaLevi Segal, 16th-17th century Polish commentator)'s interpretation, we are forbidden to follow the customs of non-Jews [see Deut 12:30, Levit 18:1-3]. Since non-Jews stopped wearing head coverings, we should go against the grain and distinguish ourselves by covering our heads.

- What size should it be? Big enough to cover the majority of your head, or at least big enough that one can see you are wearing one from any angle. Interesting that most kippot are not this big!

- When is it okay not to publicly wear a kippa? This text seems to implicitly state that one is not obligated to wear a kippa in public if it would be reasonable to expect antisemitic hostility.

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So far, we’ve really just looked at the history of the kippa/yarmulke (as is the titular focus point of this sheet), which has traditionally been a masculine head covering. But Jewish women also have a history of head coverings (in addition to the many Jewish women in modern times who wear kippot!) What do the texts say about women covering their heads?

So this excerpt is from the explanation of a ritual in which a man, if he suspects his wife has had relations with another man, takes her before a priest to be part of this ritual. The priest uncovers her hair (implying her hair is usually covered) and makes her drink a special bitter water which will either kill her, supposedly if she's guilty, or will not kill her and prove her innocence. A pretty intense punishment for cheating!

This is the earliest example in our texts of a Jewish woman's head covering. But what does Jewish law say about women covering their heads?

So, in this text, the rabbis are discussing what is considered “ervah,” translated here as “nakedness”—the word is actually related to the word “eruv,” the boundary around a private domain, such as a house’s fence or an unbroken length of wire wrapped around the exterior boundaries of a Jewish neighborhood. Based on this word connection, we might understand “ervah” to mean “something that should only be within a private domain, among members of your household (such as your spouse or children).” The rabbis determine that, among other things, a woman’s hair is ervah. But how should a woman cover her hair?

This Talmud excerpt explains that a woman should cover her hair, and that this is not just a common custom but argues that it is a Torah law based on the first line we looked at. Do you think this is a solid argument?

Then Rabbi Yishmael says that any married woman who goes out with her hair uncovered is thought to be having an affair—does this mean unmarried women did not cover their hair? Or that all the modest women covered, but “promiscuous” women did not?

Finally, the rabbis note that there are different customs on what is considered sufficient hair coverage.

So now, finally, we establish that, actually, this head covering thing is only a requirement for married women, and not all women.

This piece of halacha is discussing whether it is kosher for a man to say the Shema prayer in the same room as a woman whose hair is uncovered. One opinion is that even a little bit of woman’s hair showing means a man should not say the Shema, though a little more hair uncovered might be permissible if it’s his own wife. Another opinion says that even another woman should not say the Shema in the presence of a woman with her hair uncovered. Still another opinion says that this rule does not apply to unmarried women, since their hair is not considered private/nakedness yet. Finally, two more opinions are brought on married women who cover their hair inconsistently and who wear wigs/sheitels—the opinion is that, at least during the chanting of the Shema, they must cover their hair.

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So, we’ve now established men’s and women’s head coverings. Unfortunately, our texts are very gender-binary. However, if you are nonbinary or gender-nonconforming, I think that the best way to decide what is right for you is to start with what halachot are the same for all genders, and then explore what kinds of more historically-gender-affiliated head covering practices feel right for you!

Can wearing a kippa or headscarf affirm your gender identity and expression in Jewish spaces? Does covering your head make you feel more spiritually tuned-in? Is there a kind of fun hat, head band, or wig that would fulfill the requirements for covering your head during prayer without feeling like you are misgendering yourself?