"If So, Why Do I Exist?" Rebecca, the Great Existentialist

(54) Then he and the entourage under him ate and drank, and they spent the night. When they arose next morning, he said, “Give me leave to go to my master.” (55) But her brother and her mother said, “Let the maiden remain with us some ten days; then you may go.” (56) He said to them, “Do not delay me, now that יהוה has made my errand successful. Give me leave that I may go to my master.” (57) And they said, “Let us call the girl and ask for her reply.” (58) They called Rebekah and said to her, “Will you go with this man?” And she said, “I will.” (59) So they sent off their sister Rebekah and her nurse along with Abraham’s servant and his entourage. (60) And they blessed Rebekah and said to her,
“O sister!
May you grow
Into thousands of myriads;
May your descendants seize
The gates of their foes.” (61) Then Rebekah and her maids arose, mounted the camels, and followed the man. So the servant took Rebekah and went his way.

(1) את היי לאלפי רבבה ויירש דרעך, may all these children originate from you, as it had been said to Avraham at the time of the binding of Yitzchok: “your descendants will conquer the gates of their enemies” (22,17)

(19) This is the story of Isaac, son of Abraham. Abraham begot Isaac. (20) Isaac was forty years old when he took to wife Rebekah, daughter of Bethuel the Aramean of Paddan-aram, sister of Laban the Aramean. (21) Isaac pleaded with יהוה on behalf of his wife, because she was barren; and יהוה responded to his plea, and his wife Rebekah conceived. (22) But the children struggled in her womb, and she said, “If so, why do I exist?” She went to inquire of יהוה, (23) and יהוה answered her,
“Two nations are in your womb,
Two separate peoples shall issue from your body;
One people shall be mightier than the other,
And the older shall serve the younger.”

(1) ויתרצצו AND [THE CHILDREN] STRUGGLED — (2) ותאמר אם כן means AND SHE SAID, “IF the pain of pregnancy be so great, (3) למה זה אנכי WHY IS IT that I longed and prayed to become pregnant?” (Genesis Rabbah 63:6). (4) ותלך לדרש AND SHE WENT TO ENQUIRE at the school of Shem (Genesis Rabbah 63:6). (5) 'לדרש את ה, TO ENQUIRE OF THE LORD, that He might tell her what would happen to her at the end.

(41) Now Esau harbored a grudge against Jacob because of the blessing which his father had given him, and Esau said to himself, “Let but the mourning period of my father come, and I will kill my brother Jacob.” (42) When the words of her older son Esau were reported to Rebekah, she sent for her younger son Jacob and said to him, “Your brother Esau is consoling himself by planning to kill you. (43) Now, my son, listen to me. Flee at once to Haran, to my brother Laban. (44) Stay with him a while, until your brother’s fury subsides— (45) until your brother’s anger against you subsides—and he forgets what you have done to him. Then I will fetch you from there. Let me not lose you both in one day!” (46) Rebekah said to Isaac, “I am disgusted with my life because of the Hittite women. If Jacob marries a Hittite woman like these, from among the native women, what good will life be to me?”

She said this with intelligence to Yitzchak in order to distance Yaakov from Esav and not to reveal to him (Yitzchak) that it was because of the Esav's hatred that this was necessary.

Our Rabbis taught that this is a hint to the death of Rivka. that it why the name of the place is Alon Bachut because the crying was not for the elderly nursemaid, they did not name the site after her. Rather, Yaakov was crying and mourning over his mother, the Tzadeket whom he loved. She sent him there (to Charan) and she did not merit to see him on his return. Therefore, God revealed to him and blessed him to comfort him in which he did to Yitzchak, his father after Avraham died.

(1) ותמת דבורה מינקת רבקה, “Devorah, Rivkah’s nursemaid died.”

(2) Nachmanides quotes a Midrash (Tanchuma Ki Tetze 4) where the matter is explained. Although G’d promised Avraham that he would die of a ripe old age, he died at 175 years of age, 5 years younger than his son Yitzchak. The reason was in order to save him the mental anguish of seeing his grandson Esau become corrupt. In the case of Yitzchak, the latter was blind and could not see what his son Esau was up to. According to this Midrash, both Avraham, Yitzchak, and Rivkah ended their lives experiencing a degree of shame. Rivkah’s funeral lacked the presence of her loving son Yaakov, and presumably the presence of her son Esau who hated her. When she died, people cursed the passing of a woman who had nursed an evil person such as Esau. For these and other reasons G’d decided to console Yaakov by blessing him at this time. The plural form בכות, “weeping,” is accounted for because as soon as Yaakov was about to weep for the death of Devorah, he received word that his mother had died. His weeping was for the passing of both these women.

“Deborah, Rebecca’s nurse, died, and she was buried below Beit El, beneath the oak, and he called its name Alon Bakhut” (Genesis 35:8).
“God appeared to Jacob again, already upon his arrival from Padan Aram, and He blessed him” (Genesis 35:9).
“Deborah, Rebecca's nurse, died…and he called its name Alon Bakhut” – Rabbi Shmuel bar Naḥman said: In the Greek language, alon means other. While he [Jacob] was still observing the mourning for Deborah, the report that his mother had died came to him. That is what is written: “God appeared to Jacob…and He blessed him.” With which blessing did he bless him? Rav Aḥa said in the name of Rabbi Yoḥanan: He blessed him with the blessing of the mourners.